Reading the New York Post usually provides some examples of colorful language or unusual neologisms. In today’s paper, I had to laugh when I saw an ad for Hillside Honda’s “really big spring event.”

The ad says that customers will have to make “ZERO down payment…ZERO first month payment…ZERO security deposit” and “ZERO due at lease signing.”

Except there’s a little asterisk right after the word “signing” and on the very next line it says, “Excludes taxes, titles and dealer fees.”

So…not really zero then.

Also in the Post, columnist Phil Mushnick—I believe he should win a Pulitzer for commentary, and I’m not kidding—points out how uncool it was of Red Sox David Ortiz to pronounce, in front of “a ballpark packed with families,” that Boston “is our fucking city.”

It may seem a small thing compared to the obscenity kids in Boston were exposed to last Monday, but in such times those small things matter even more.

As Mushnick writes, “Even those moments intended to be right and righteous are now left compromised and diminished by “attitude” and crudity, short of being as good as they could have and should have been.”

(Maybe it was the steroids speaking.)

To put it another way: What would Lou Gehrig say?