So Rick Santorum is now blaming priest pedophilia on the fact that many priests…live in Boston. No, for real. You think I’m making this up; you think that surely a United States senator could not be such a horse’s ass; but you can’t make this stuff up.

In an article on the website Catholic Online, Santorum writes about why the priest-child abuse scandal is actually a good thing: “I see in this fall an opportunity for ecclesial rebirth and a new evangelization of America,” he proclaims.

But before he can say why, Santorum has to limit the damage from the scandal. He does so by—what else—blaming liberals.

He writes: “It is startling that those in the media and academia appear most disturbed by this aberrant behavior, since they have zealously promoted moral relativism by sanctioning “private” moral matters such as alternative lifestyles. Priests, like all of us, are affected by culture. When the culture is sick, every element in it becomes infected. While it is no excuse for this scandal, it is no surprise that Boston, a seat of academic, political and cultural liberalism in America, lies at the center of the storm.”

When the culture is sick, every element of it becomes infected.

Republicans are supposed to be the party of individual responsibility, right? Apparently not. Priests who molest children are just the victim of their “sick” cultural environment. They must be watching too much MTV. The point is, it’s not their fault.

And Boston? Has Rick Santorum ever even been to Boston? If he had, he’d know that it’s socially a profoundly conservative city. Think Irish Catholic, senator. Think Italian and Catholic. Think…well. just think Catholic. I mean, if the culture of Boston is sick, whose fault is that exactly?

(All right, there are some African-Americans—quite religious in Boston—and high WASPs thrown in. Not exactly cultural radicals.)

You know, senator, Philadelphia’s a pretty liberal city too. Hasn’t had a Republican mayor since Reconstruction, probably. Quite a few universities.

Maybe the one thing that saves Philadelphia from having as many priest child molesters as Boston is…hmmmm….because there aren’t as many priests?