"You have the Rolex Submariner, the summer home in the Hamptons and a Porsche Boxter to get you there. Your degree from Harvard Business School sits next to your latest plasma, digital whatever.
But do you have a pair of sleek nose-hair clippers?"
Someone with a macho Submariner and who speaks of "home runs" doesn't need this article to tell him to keep condoms on hand. Funnier is to suggest he get $42 MD Skincare Sunscreen pads!
The Onion couldn't have written this one any better.