Things I'm Shocked, Shocked About
1) Apparently there's
a lesbian in the WNBA. Stop the presses! Next thing you know, someone will say
the Pet Shop Boys are gay.
2) Exxon has made
a $25 billion profit this year—equal to its entire earnings for 2004. No way! And the great part is that it's doing so much to deal with the whole global warming thing.
3)
Scooter Libby is going to be indicted for dishing dirt in one allegedly illegal way or another. Hard to believe that anyone working for Dick Cheney would do something like that.
4)
Freddy Ferrer is getting crushed by Michael Bloomberg even among the voters who ought to be his base. It's as if he hasn't even articulated a rationale for his campaign!
5) AOL has hired
Dick Cheney's daughter, Mary—and she's a lesbian too! This after Cheney received a million-dollar advance to write a book about her life. I'm sure that she was hired because of her proven ability "to increase AOL's Internet audience via Web-based programming and products," as an AOL spokesperson put it.
6) There are
39 months of the Bush presidency to go. Apparently that's more than three years.
Actually, now that I think about it, I am kind of shocked by that. Doesn't it already seem as if he's been president for, like, a decade?
